Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Friend-Centric Conversation

"Complaining, demanding, engaging in one upmanship with friends - women who thrive on attention are on a fast track to loneliness. Are you one of them?"

Stop hogging the conversation. The next tie you are with a friend let her know that she matters to you by :
  • Making eye contact while you are talking - don't play with the sugar or your straw or you will give the impression you are not listening.

  • Kicking off the conversation by asking how she is and what is been going on in her life.

  • Checking back with her about what she is saying to let her know you are interested as well as listening. Ask questions like "How did you feel about that" and "Does it still bother you now?"

  • Avoid bringing yourself or your own experiences into the conversation for as long as possible.

  • Make statements that show you empathise e.g. "That must have been awful" or "No wonder you felt so upset."

  • If you get interrupted by the waiter taking your order or someone you know stopping to say "hello", make a mental note of what your friend was saying so that you can immediately pick up conversation where it left out.


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